Life as it is happening: Flight to AZ coming up

If you don't know about Elia's Journey of Faith you can click here to see her story.

Next Monday June 23 I will be flying to see my Grandaughter Elia and of course her Mom and Dad too. My daughter has sent me the latest Airline rule changes so that I will be good to go. Here they are

Attendant: Welcome aboard Ala Carte Air, sir. May I see your ticket? > > Passenger: Sure. > > Attendant: You're in seat 12B. That will be $5, please! > > Passenger: What for? > > Attendant: For telling you where to sit. > > Passenger: But I already knew where to sit. > > Attendant: Nevertheless, we are now charging a seat locator fee of $5.> It's the airline's new policy. > > Passenger: That's the craziest thing I ever heard. I won't pay it. > > Attendant: Sir, do you want a seat on this flight, or not? > > Passenger: Yes, yes. All right, I'll pay. But the airline is going to> hear about this. > > Attendant: Thank you. My goodness, your carry-on bag looks heavy. Would> you like me to stow it in the overhead compartment for you? > > Passenger: That would be swell, thanks. > > Attendant: No problem. Up we go, and done! That will be $10, please. > > Passenger: What? > > Attendant: The airline now charges a $10 carry-on assistance fee. > > Passenger: This is extortion. I won't stand for it. > > Attendant: Actually, you're right, you can't stand. You need to sit, and> fasten your seat belt. We're about to push back from the gate. But,> first I need that $10. > > Passenger: No way! > > Attendant: Sir, if you don't comply, I will be forced to call the air> marshal. And you really don't want me to do that. > > Passenger: Why not? Is he going to shoot me? > > Attendant: No, but there's a $50 air-marshal hailing fee. > > Passenger: Oh, all right, here, take the $10. I can't believe this. > > Attendant: Thank you for your cooperation, sir. Is there anything else> I can do for you? > > Passenger: Yes. It's stuffy in here, and my overhead fan doesn't seem> to work. Can you fix it? > > Attendant: Your overhead fan is not broken, sir. Just insert two> quarters into the overhead coin slot for the first five minutes. > > Passenger: The airline is charging me for cabin air? > > Attendant: Of course not, sir. Stagnant cabin air is provided free of> charge. It's the circulating air that costs 50 cents. > > Passenger: I don't have any quarters. Can you make change for a dollar?> > > Attendant: Certainly, sir! Here you go! > > Passenger: But you've given me only three quarters for my dollar. > > Attendant: Yes, there's a change making fee of 25 cents. > > Passenger: For crying' out loud. All I have left is a lousy quarter?> What the heck can I do with this? > > Attendant: Hang onto it. You'll need it later for the lavatory.> > Some days there won't be a song in your heart. Sing anyway. > _________________________________________________________________